5 stages online dating

Here Kara loses her job or Sam's grandmother dies and he is devastated, or Chris has a medical crisis.

The couple is challenged to respond as a unit – to be supportive about the job, to come or not to the funeral, to face the medical issues together -- all a testing of the strength of the relationship and each partner's ability to deal with crises and anxiety.

This is the only way of knowing whether or not you are truly compatible.

Stage 2: Unsettled settling As Chris has noticed the landscape has changed. This is not about fault or blame and more about, once again, chemistry – the oxytocin has dropped.

By mapping out the stages you can know what to expect and anticipate the challenges ahead.

What this all translates into for couples is the natural experience that things are settling or a winding down.

Routines set in, the hot chemistry is okay, but less hot.

The emotional side is finding that you have a lot in common, that your views of the world are the same, that you share a sense of humor or like the same music.

Running along this is finding in each other what you most need – someone who listens or someone who seems decisive; someone who is gentle or someone who is strong and confident. One obvious danger or downside is that you never get beyond one or two dates.